Comments on: I Disrespect My Disrespectful Peer. What Can I Do? https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/ VitalSmarts is now Crucial Learning Tue, 16 Mar 2021 19:59:09 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.5.2 By: Hanne https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/#comment-7653 Tue, 16 Mar 2021 19:59:09 +0000 https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/?p=9070#comment-7653 I LOVE this article. So empowering to know we are able to change our patterns of thinking, feeling and acting, rather than having to change the world around us.

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By: Hanne Wulp https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/#comment-7652 Tue, 16 Mar 2021 19:56:16 +0000 https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/?p=9070#comment-7652 In reply to George Wilhelmsen.

In my field we call these norms ground rules. Beforehand we have everyone agree to the ground rules (like: no interrupting or framed as a positive action, like let everyone finish their sentences). I love them, because they set the stage of workable behaviors and it is easy to remind everyone of them when someone gets a little ahead of themselves and starts cutting off others or displays other unworkable behavior.

When the opportunity of ground rules isn’t used, pausing the content and setting boundaries/ working on the process during the meeting is also acceptable and can smoothen out a meeting.

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By: Ryan Trimble https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/#comment-7651 Wed, 10 Mar 2021 22:48:14 +0000 https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/?p=9070#comment-7651 In reply to Charles Feltman.

Well said, Charles. Thank you.

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By: Charles Feltman https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/#comment-7650 Thu, 04 Mar 2021 21:39:51 +0000 https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/?p=9070#comment-7650 Right on Ryan. As you say so well, when I stop arguing with what is – an argument I will never win – I am free to choose. I can step outside of my story and look at the effect it is having on me – the thoughts I have about myself and others in the situation, the emotions it brings up, what it does in my body, and how it affects the range of actions I can imagine taking. I can choose to try out other emotions and a different, more empowering story. I could even choose no story at all. Thank you.

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By: RUBY METZ https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/#comment-7649 Wed, 03 Mar 2021 22:51:45 +0000 https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/?p=9070#comment-7649 Fabulous article! As I read the beginning concern / complaint, I thought, yes, that happens all the time! Then, as I pondered a bit more, I realized that I also could be one of the said accused disrespectful peer at times as well! I think that we need to be careful and always try to be considerate of other people around us when providing information ensuring pertinence in meetings keeping in mind how we are perceived. This article reminds myself that I too have much work to do on myself to be able to listen respectably, and speak considerately.

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By: Justin https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/#comment-7648 Wed, 03 Mar 2021 17:24:18 +0000 https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/?p=9070#comment-7648 These are really helpful thoughts. Great article Ryan!

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By: George Wilhelmsen https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/#comment-7647 Wed, 03 Mar 2021 16:59:03 +0000 https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/?p=9070#comment-7647 Setting norms for meetings in advance can help. One norm we used was “no idea is a bad idea – please share all your ideas and thoughts.”

Then the meeting organizer gate keeps – if someone shoots down an idea, they simply say “Remember, we are writing down all ideas – sometimes something that doesn’t seem possible is actually a great idea, other times it isn’t. If we don’t hear people out, we could miss an opportunity. (Name of person cut off), please go on about your idea.”

If it continues, then you have the crucial conversation with the person, off line. if necessary, take a break and address the disruptive behavior that is outside of the agreed norms.

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By: Linda M Sanders https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/#comment-7646 Wed, 03 Mar 2021 15:59:20 +0000 https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/?p=9070#comment-7646 Thanks for this article. I have had times where I have felt this way and I feel like I have been the one cutting people off or overzealously sharing my opinions and ideas. I am always searching for ways to change my story or perception of what is going on…I have much work to do.

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By: Emma Lewis https://cruciallearning.com/blog/i-disrespect-my-disrespectful-peer-what-can-i-do/#comment-7645 Wed, 03 Mar 2021 15:04:42 +0000 https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/?p=9070#comment-7645 i was in a meeting with my superverion last week and i had a employee enter the meeting that did not belong there she was so dispectful to me

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