Comments on: From the Road: Give 'Em The Ol' Ask and Wait!

By: Brian Taylor

Brian Taylor — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 09:25:12 +0000

That’s a good point, Steve. It occasionally does seem an eternity when waiting for an answer. Sometimes, when presenting in this situation and the silence continues, I’ve found it helpful to ask the question again, or to re-phrase it. Or, I’ve asked a prompting question like “what do you think?” with very open body language. Or, again, I sometimes choose someone in the group who “looks” like they would like to respond and I ask “What do you think, Steve?”. These usually seem to elicit a response.
Regards,
Brian
‘Sydneyman’

By: James Brown

James Brown — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 18:10:03 +0000

Ask and Wait is a great training technique but don’t forget the follow-up, Rephrase as Necessary. If I ask a question and instead of getting an answer I get confused looks, I know I probably asked a poor question. After 5 seconds or so I’ll rephrase the question and then start the 10 second clock over again. It emphasizes that I’m not going to let them off the hook while also making it easier for them to answer.

By: Darla

Darla — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 15:06:51 +0000

Thank you! A great tool!

By: Tami

Tami — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 14:18:50 +0000

I read my Crucial Skills newsletter every week. I so appreciate the wisdom and advice that I glean and try to incorporate into my life. I wanted to take a moment and respond briefly to this article. Thank you for sharing the ask and wait approach. Being able to wait patiently in silence speaks volumes about your self-confidence, in any situation.

By: Dale Brochis

Dale Brochis — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 14:12:37 +0000

Having been through Crucial Conversations seminar at my own organization, I can tell you first hand that the amount of comfortable participation is greatly dependent upon who is in the audience with you.

Our organization had a seminar for “Leadership”, which included executive and senior leadership as well as middle management.

Unsure of how to speak in front of those to whom you wish to speak to answer a question from someone teaching you how to speak….no wonder there is hesitancy and lack of trust initially…..

I think some guidance on who should attend for the most benefit would be helpful when planning…..

By: Lois Ward

Lois Ward — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 14:01:53 +0000

I’ve found another way to sometimes get a response and break the ice is to say, “This is the interactive part” or “This is where you talk.” It usually gets a chuckle and a response.

I appreciate your tips!