Comments on: Putting Skills into Action

By: Chad Andrews

Chad Andrews — Thu, 07 Jun 2012 18:33:28 +0000

Dear CC, Emotions tend to be hard to control. One aspect of the Crucial Conversation model is the question: What do I want? If my attitude is off and “I don’t know what I want” the words- even if technically correct- tend to have the wrong tone. If possible I wait until I am clear on the “what do I want” and the words tend to work out. In a recent real time job situation, someone I supervise(who is usually competent) didn’t want to do an assigned task. That was somewhat irritating. What did I want? I wanted to find out their perspective on what was going on. I wanted them to do the task, but I also wanted them to feel heard and respected in the exchange. After I got “the right mindset” I said: “I want to discuss your concerns about …We had a good open conversation and the issue was resolved.

By: Closing the gap between knowing and doing « Tools for Navigating Business Without a Script

Wed, 06 Jun 2012 19:34:56 +0000

[…] Respected and internationally known training and educational provider, Crucial Conversations says: […]

By: Daniel S

Daniel S — Wed, 06 Jun 2012 13:27:27 +0000

While obviously the tendency is to stifle your emotional response to a high pressure situation, this is not always the best course of action. A better goal is to alter your emotional response entirely. This is by no means easy. The key is to start small, where possible, and often. Address the simple crucial conversations first. Do this often. Slowly build confidence and move on to harder conversations. Through enough practice and learning, the “skilled” conversations will slowly become your default response to a high pressure situation, and in that situation your body will be able to expertly handle it. If you are trying to diver right into high stakes conversations without practice you probably won’t do so well. You have to crawl before you can walk.

By: Luis

Luis — Wed, 06 Jun 2012 12:45:57 +0000

My prior comment accentuates the article’s stance on solving underlying problems. My point was to do a full assessment (both self and clinical) of all your underlying issues. Good luck to all.

By: Luis

Luis — Wed, 06 Jun 2012 12:40:25 +0000

The only thing I would add (coming as just an opinion from a reader) is that some people, through whatever traumas they experienced in their past history, have damaged their amygdala to the extent that they cannot consciously bypass their reactions no matter how much they “practice”. For this case, then, you would need to see a specialist to treat the medical problem first before continuing any more training.