Comments on: Protecting Your Children

By: editor

editor — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 15:17:51 +0000

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By: Concerned Gama

Concerned Gama — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 13:45:00 +0000

I have a situation where I am concerned that the dog my daughter has is too big and may be harming our grandchildren. She treats the dog like a baby and it is very territorial, It has scratched, nipped and wrapped its leash around my granddaughter who is only 5 years old. I think her priorities are not right and the dog should be removed. How do I approach? She already knows we do not like the dogs behavior. The dog is a pitbull who weighs more than the children at 50+ pounds.

By: Joe Lehman

Joe Lehman — Thu, 14 Apr 2011 13:12:06 +0000

I agree with Laura Moen. This could be the very first sign of some physical or emotional problem and begs looking more closely at dad’s behavior in other areas.

If he checks out ok then the crucial skills are in order.

By: Laura Moen

Laura Moen — Wed, 13 Apr 2011 20:45:58 +0000

Umm – I had a different take on this. Is it possible that the father-in-law is beginning to develop some type of cognitive impairment that causes him to be unable to either remember the event or express concern about the feelings of others? Has he exhibited any other personality or behavioral changes that might support this possibility? Just a thought. I hope everything works out OK.

By: #11

#11 — Wed, 13 Apr 2011 18:52:23 +0000

We had a similar situation with my parents’ dog when my children were little. The understanding we came to was that the animal was confined to a part of the house via a baby gate. That way the dog was still comfortable and the children were safe. They are now 20, 18 and 17 and the dog is long gone, the children were not bitten, (although each of my parents were at one time or another) and the children were taught to appropriately respect the dog and his space. I confess I would have felt better not having the dog around at all, but this compromise protected our relationship with my parents who we visited weekly. Some dogs just don’t do well around children, some dogs are territorial and protect their owner or act jealous about their owners, and some dogs are just plain mean — that may weigh in on your decision. :0)

By: Ralph

Ralph — Wed, 13 Apr 2011 16:55:21 +0000

I don’t mean to pile on here, but my question: is this a huge dog, or a tiny yappy one? If a tiny dog punctures my child’s hand the world will not stop turning. I don’t advocated for that experience, but the risk might be overblown.

That said, I cannot yet understand why some pet owners insist on taking their dogs into people’s homes that do not have pets. I’m guessing you don’t or the drama level would be lower. If you have a “no pets inside” policy for your family, it’s certainly reasonable to expect that to be honored as well. One idea might be to assigne one of your older kids to “help grandpa” by taking the kennel to the garage and taking care of the dog there. Physically remove the dog to a space that keeps the youngest free from accident, teach all the kids how to treat dogs, and make the “play with the dog” moment available but in a safer/more controlled environment. Working with Grandpa on this allows him to share his love of his dog with the grandkids. I don’t think you should go down the sucker’s choice road. Find a third alternative.

If the dog is big and posed real danger to your child, more drastic steps need to be taken. As a child I was bit above the eye and got some really cool stitches. The second time that dog did that we “retired” it.

Good luck and best wishes!

By: animal and child lover

animal and child lover — Wed, 13 Apr 2011 16:24:20 +0000

The fact that young children do not understand that what they do can result in dog bites is the key here. They are too young to protect themselves. It is not the dog ALONE that is the problem – as evidenced by the phrase – “in the last year”. Dogs age, have aches, pains, and get grouchy, and this results in associated changes in behavior.

You failed to include the behaviors of the young children that put them at risk. They think they are playing but they may be hurting or scaring the animal. They cannot read the actions of an animal that wants to be left alone. Parents of children need to address their behavior, and be responsible for it as well. This is a problem that requires equal responsibility, accountability, and action.

By: Jon Gray

Jon Gray — Wed, 13 Apr 2011 14:29:18 +0000

On the dog around the children issue — put a muzzle on the dog when it is around the grandchildren or visiting in the house. I see that as a compromise that lets the dog out and protects the grandchildren.

By: Steve W

Steve W — Wed, 13 Apr 2011 13:46:21 +0000

The husband, who is the son of the father, ought to be taking the lead in this situation. The relationship status in various situation is important. There are solutions, such as taking the dog for a walk, that should work. If dad ignores the son and will not work with you, then banning the dog from the property and then dad are the next steps. Not visiting dad again has to be put in the mix. While these might be last resort, some people are absolute jerks. I know most of the time, the conversations in here are gentle to match the tone of crucial conversations, but sometimes you must have a conversation that holds an ultimate threat when we are talking about something this serious.

By: Marta Paras

Marta Paras — Wed, 13 Apr 2011 13:35:40 +0000

While I agree that the children’s safety is paramount, there is too much information lacking in what was presented to start imposing constraints on Dad’s dog IN HIS OWN HOME. In the childrens parents’ home is a different story. Questions the parents need to ask themselves are: Did the children provoke the dog by teasing, hanging on it, pulling hair, etc. Education is a two way street and while Dad does seem to be downplaying what could happen, the children also need to be educated about behavior around an unfamiliar animal. I hope “Mom” listens to Dad’s side of the story on this.