Comments on: Kerrying On: I Need Help

By: Surviving the Holidays | Shared Visions

Surviving the Holidays | Shared Visions — Wed, 21 Nov 2012 16:48:35 +0000

[…] Kerrying On: I Need Help […]

By: Judith Williams

Judith Williams — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 15:04:46 +0000

Soon after I read “Kerrying On: I Need Help,” I ran across the poem “Atlas” by Kay Ryan, and was struck by the similarity in message. The poem starts out
Extreme exertion
isolates a person
from help

Ryan is the sixteenth Poet Laureate of the United States. This poem is in her book The Niagara River.

By: Julinda

Julinda — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 19:07:50 +0000

I loved this! I too have a problem asking for help. I had loving parents but as the youngest of seven, I guess I grew up feeling like I had to prove myself by doing things without help. This usually works out okay in my personal life but it has hurt me at work, when I would procrastinate working on something because I didn’t know what to do and hated to ask for help!

By: Linda

Linda — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 18:05:21 +0000

I, too was moved almost to tears by this article. Like you, I have been fiercely independent since I left home at the age of 17. I needed help from no one and could handle anything that came up. Then my baby sister moved in with me because she needed a place to live and I was diagnosed with breast cancer which was treated with chemotherapy and radiation. I learned to ask for help because I had to and I still hated it, but my sweet sister taught me to let her help me because she loved me. I still have trouble asking, but I’m getting better. All us independent types need to practice asking for help, before we’re forced to. I have a quote on my wall that says “It is better to learn humility voluntarily than involuntarily.” Thanks…

By: Kathy Hopkins

Kathy Hopkins — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 00:17:51 +0000

I loved this story.

By: Pam

Pam — Fri, 28 May 2010 17:25:16 +0000

Kerry, have you considered publishing all of your stories in a book? I would love to have them all in one place for reference … and yes, for inspiration!

Regarding today’s story and bullheaded independence. I had someone tell me something a LONG time ago that changed my own actions, and I repeat it often too, when I’m faced with that independence in others. When we refuse the help of others or refuse to ask help of others, we deprive them of something they need … the opportunity to help. The people who love us the most often feel desperately inadequate to offer comforting words when faced with our misfortunes, and being able to DO something helps them. We are being selfish to deny them this opportunity. I don’t advocate giving up all independence, of course. Just ask yourself what your loved one might need and see if you can’t gracefully accept their help. Thank you for a heartfelt, genuine story.

By: Anne

Anne — Fri, 28 May 2010 15:33:47 +0000

Hi Kerry: Yet another riveting read! This is why we owe so much to people who have gathered life lessons and share stories freely with the rest of us. As we have watched with the recession of “older” (depends on the field, of course) workers being pushed out of careers without thought to their experiences and what they bring to the table; this story highlights yet again the value of each individual, their collective assets and the interconnectivity of the human experience. I have been on both sides of this awkward table: fear of being perceived as not knowing enough for where I am at to looking foolish as a new employee and being told “I cannot believe you asked that question”! Have a great holiday!

By: Pamela Baker

Pamela Baker — Thu, 27 May 2010 15:30:11 +0000

Mr. Patterson, I loved the story about your grandfather, and think that you should write a book about his childhood experience. As for the incident in Paris, I encourage you trust and act upon your good intuition in the future. Women don’t have exclusive rights to intuition.

By: bean q

bean q — Thu, 27 May 2010 01:41:55 +0000

i admire your stewardship, but it’s really up to your wife to say something first and foremost.

AND if your grandpa was taught domestic skills by necessity, why didn’t HE teach his daughter those things in addition to plumbing and hammering?!

By: Peter Chau

Peter Chau — Thu, 27 May 2010 00:27:52 +0000

Re: Article “I Need Help” issued on 26th May (Vol. 8 Issue 21) is just a great article.
My childhood life is very similar to “Billy” the grandfather, and may be because of that, I also have the same problem about this sense of independence – I very seldom ask for help and even feel shy or inferior to ask for direction or for assistance. I always feel that in doing so will make me look stupid and people just would not like to respond.
I am glad that the guy finally had a break through on this. But how does he change all this ? It would help me a lot if I know the “how”.

From: Peter Chau